Proper Pancakes
by Reefgirl
Summary: It's Pancake Day on Atlantis and Rodney and John's idea of proper pancakes differ from Alex the Chef's, chaos ensues.


Rating: T

Spoilers: Everything

Pairings: Only friendships

Summary: It is Pancake Day on Atlantis and familiarity breeds' contempt

Disclaimer: I own none of it, Lydia belongs to BiteMeTechie, Crysta belongs to NenyaVilyaNenya, Max and the kids belong to Elizabeth Bartlett. Alex, Delilah and Maria belong to me.

Authors Notes: It is Pancake Day and this little piece came to me as I was making them for tea tonight.

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Rodney was making his way to the mess hall, rumour had it that there were pancakes for breakfast, which was enough to get Rodney out of bed early. Pancakes were a bit of a rarity these days as the supplies were difficult to get hold of but Alex the head chef had put in a special request to the SGC and the ingredients had arrived via the Stargate during the night. As he got closer to the mess hall he could smell something and it didn't smell like any pancake he knew, in fact it smelt like... .

"Lemons!!" bellowed McKay "who the hell puts lemons on pancakes?"

"We do" said Mick the sous chef and left McKay to his ranting

"And what the hell are these" said Rodney

"Um...let me think, it's Pancake Day sooooo, I'll give you three guesses" said Alex the chef.

"That's not a proper pancake" said Rodney

"It's what's on the menu, everyone else is happy, eat it or have cereal" Alex replied

"No, you said pancakes were on the menu and I want proper pancakes" said Rodney. Alex opened her mouth and then closed it again with a smile as Major Evan Lorne and his daughter Maria came up to the counter,

"You gonna stand there all day McKay" said Lorne

"I want proper pancakes" said McKay petulantly

"They are proper pancakes, the come from Eu..ro..pe, Max told us about it yesterday" piped up Maria as Lorne picked up the two plates Alex had filled for them

"Oh and Miss Max knows all about pancakes does she" retorted McKay

"She said, in the olden days on Earth people made pancakes to use up eggs, flour and milk because the church said they couldn't eat them for forty days before Easter, or somefin' like that" replied Maria

"Why don't we go and join Max eh" said Lorne, seeing Rodney's face going purple as people laughed at him for being given a lecture on pancake history by a five-year-old girl who'd been born in the Pegasus galaxy. Lorne and Maria went to join Max and her friends Lydia and Crysta at a table by the window. Elizabeth walked up behind Rodney

"What's the matter" she asked.

"_She_ won't make proper pancakes" snarled McKay, Elizabeth looked at the counter

"They look proper enough to me" she said as she helped herself to the pancakes and liberally sprinkled them with lemon and sugar "They're crepes"

"I want proper pancakes" he said again.

"He's worse than the kids, in fact I haven't had half the problems with the kids that I've had with him, the only thing they couldn't decide on was what topping to have" said Alex with a grin. Elizabeth leaned over the counter

"How on Atlantis did you get the SGC to send the ingredients through the Stargate" she asked

"That was Delilah Stirling, her aunt is Lady Laura Harlington, the British member of the IOA, Delilah said that seeing as the IOA pulled out all the stops for American feast days she'd ask her aunt if she could get pancake ingredients to us, which she obviously did" said Alex

"Fair enough" said Elizabeth "But next time, ask me first"

"Ok" said a chastened Alex.

"Hello, proper pancakes" said Rodney

"Suck a lemon and drop dead Rodders" Alex said with a sigh.

"Hey I thought you said pancakes were on the menu" said Sheppard

"They're crepes daddy, they're French pancakes" said his daughter Jamie as she helped herself

"I don't care where they come from I'm hungry" said her brother Jason as he picked up a plateful

"Go and sit with your mother and Ronon" yelled Sheppard as they ran off

"Thank God, I've been trying to tell her these weren't proper pancakes" said McKay.

"Oh for fucks sake, if you want those things you call pancakes you can fucking well make them" said Alex as she threw her hat at them and stalked off to join her friends at the table by the window. John and Rodney looked at each other

"How hard can it be" said John.

* * *

An hour later, they emerged from Elizabeth's office looking like chastised schoolboys, they had decided to take up Alex's offer to cook their own pancakes and it hadn't gone well, they had managed to burn their pancakes, which in turn had set off the fire alarms, which in turn had set off the sprinklers. Alex had been the first to yell at them for ruining her kitchen, Elizabeth had followed, accusing them of letting their childish rivalry and stubborn reluctance to try anything new get the better of them and nearly destroy the city. Now they were sitting in the mess hall with a plate of English pancakes in front of them

"You know, these aren't too bad" said Sheppard with his mouth full.

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**AN:** Rodney and John's idea of proper pancakes are the American style, Alex's idea is the European style Crepe. Think of me at work spending all night making pancakes.

Sous Chef – second in charge in a kitchen


End file.
